If there’s one thing I’ve learned after coaching hundreds of real estate agents, team leaders, and broker owners across North America, it’s this:
Success without balance doesn’t last.
Yes, our job as coaches is to help people grow their business and increase their income. That matters. But that’s never the only goal — and it was never meant to be.
For most people, real success is twofold:
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You want to earn more.
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You want more time, security, and freedom to actually enjoy your life.
When a real estate business delivers income but steals everything else — health, family time, relationships, peace of mind — there’s a problem. And I see that problem far too often in this industry.
VIDEO: Life Balance for Realtors: How to Build Success and a Life That Lasts
The Real Estate Hustle Myth (And Why It Backfires)
I respect hard work. I like people who can work. Real estate does require effort, discipline, and consistency.
But there’s a big difference between working hard and bragging about being burned out.
You see it all the time:
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Agents posting on social media about working until 2 a.m.
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Photos of laptops in dark offices.
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“Rise and grind” culture framed as the cost of success.
Here’s the reality most people don’t want to admit:
If you’re a leader — a team leader or a broker owner — and you’re broadcasting that all you do is work…
most people don’t find that impressive.
They look at it and think:
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Don’t you have a family?
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Do you have anything else going on in your life?
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Of course you sell that much — you’re working twice as much as everyone else.
And here’s the kicker:
People who are considering joining your team or brokerage do not want that life.
They want success and balance. They already have families. They already want hobbies, health, and time. Hustle-only messaging quietly repels the very people you want to attract.
Even if you are a hard worker (and many high performers are), that lifestyle will burn you out eventually. I’ve seen it over and over again — and I’ve lived it myself.
Longevity Requires Balance (I Had to Learn This the Hard Way)
I’ve had a lot of success in real estate — selling homes, owning and operating brokerages, and now running a coaching and consulting company.
And one thing that has always bothered me is this assumption people make:
“You must not have a life.”
That’s the stigma successful people sometimes give off — unintentionally. And for a while, earlier in my career, it wasn’t entirely wrong.
Today, I’m proud to say I have a very good life balance — better than at many other points in my life.
But it didn’t happen naturally.
It happened because I got intentional.
That’s what this is really about.
The Life Balance Wheel: How We Coach Balance at ICT
One of the core tools we use at Icenhower Coaching & Training is something called the Life Balance Wheel. It’s simple, but powerful — and only effective if you actually use it.
The wheel breaks life into key areas (or “spokes”), including:
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Spirituality
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Health
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Work
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Social / Community
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Personal Development
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Recreation
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Family
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Life Planning
There are lots of ways to define balance, but in my experience, this framework covers the areas that matter most for real estate professionals.
Let me walk you through how we think about each one.
Spirituality
This looks different for everyone. For some, it’s church. For others, meditation. For many, it’s simply connecting to something larger than yourself.
For me, spirituality helps me step outside my own stress and ego and look at my life objectively. Ironically, this is one of the first areas people cut when they get busy — even though it may be the most important.
I know that because I still have to protect it myself. Accountability matters here.
Health
Health is non-negotiable.
When I’m working out, eating well, and managing stress:
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I need less sleep
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I have more energy
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I’m more focused
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I’m a better leader
When I’m not… everything suffers.
Real estate is demanding enough without dragging an unhealthy body through it.
Work
Most of our clients excel here. But work balance isn’t just about income.
It includes:
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Skill improvement
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Leadership
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Management
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Structure
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Sustainability
Making money is important — but how you make it matters just as much.
Social & Community
Who you spend time with matters.
You’re the aggregate of the people you spend the most time around. Choose poorly, and they’ll pull you backward. Choose well, and they’ll push you forward.
This includes friends, peers, and your environment.
Personal Development
This is about improving yourself — intellectually, emotionally, professionally.
Books. Podcasts. Coaching. Education.
Growth doesn’t stop just because you’re busy.
Recreation
This is where a lot of driven people fall short.
Hobbies. Travel. Fun. Time away.
Vacations don’t happen by accident — you have to plan for them.
If you wait until you “have time,” you’ll never go.
Family
This one is obvious — and often neglected.
Marriage. Parenting. Relationships.
Success at work doesn’t compensate for failure at home.
Life Planning
This includes:
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Financial planning
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Time management
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Goal setting
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Business and personal alignment
At my house, this looks like monthly planning meetings with my wife. We talk goals, finances, calendars, and priorities — on purpose.
How to Use the Life Balance Wheel (The Part That Actually Matters)
Here’s how we use this with clients:
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Rate yourself 1–10 in each category
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Draw the wheel
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Look for the lowest areas — that’s where you focus first
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Put actions in your calendar, not just your head
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Revisit it regularly
Balance doesn’t happen naturally.
It happens with intention and accountability.
Left alone, this exercise gets put on a shelf.
Accountability Is the Difference-Maker
This is why coaching works.
Information isn’t the problem — follow-through is.
I’m fortunate to have accountability:
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My wife
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Our coaches
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Our team
If you want life balance in a hurry, don’t try to do it alone.
Who you run with determines how fast — and how well — you run.
How to use the Life Balance Wheel to achieve better life balance for Realtors
When you’re looking at the various spokes of the life balance wheel, each describes different aspects of your life. Making sure that you address each spoke will help keep you in balance as a human being.
Download the Life Balance Wheel below, print it off, and give yourself a “score” for each spoke. 1-10, how are you doing with each aspect of your life? Which areas need more attention? Doing this activity regularly will help you achieve a better life balance as a Realtor.
Final Thought
At Icenhower Coaching & Training, we care deeply about helping agents earn more — but not at the expense of their life.
That’s not what it’s for.
You’re only getting one turn on this planet.
Build a business that supports that reality.
If this framework resonates with you, watch the video below where I walk through the Life Balance Wheel in detail — and download one of the many versions available to start the exercise yourself.
And if you want support implementing it, accountability is what turns good intentions into real change.
